In Memory of Dear Father (1941-2013)

11-June-2013, the devastating phone call shattered my heart. I cried out loud but nothing could bring him back alive:( Even writing about it now brings tears to my eyes.The man we loved the most is no more after one month struggling in ICU. I knew you fought your best acha (father), you fought hard to keep breathing for your family sake but god loves you more.Though it was hard we had to accept the fact and let you go peacefully. If only you were alive now and be there for my wedding day, If only i can hug and kiss you again, If only i can see your innocent smile again, If only i can ask for Sorry for hurting you & If only i can say I Love You! Below is a memoir written by me & my siblings for my father's book release, Thanks to his good friends who worked to fulfil his last wish. Yes finally it was released last year ( 2014) a book about his life. Below is the memoir :

This memoir is written in living remembrance of our dearest father who was the most lovable hero that will be missed forever. Every human being is born and brought to this world by a man and a woman who we address them as parents. We as their children have that special person in our lives and felt fortunate about it .We are also very grateful to them who brought us up to the successful person we are now.The best words to describe our father would be unwavering love, honesty, humility and definitely a man of extra ordinary moral courage. The values that he embraced were a legacy for us to emulate indeed.

His nature of forgiving and sincerity gave us the much needed believe in leading a purposeful life for all of us. He is a true life hero who put others above him and never longed for anything in returns at any time. The entire life lessons taught by our father were humility, courage and honesty. The most memorable wisdom advice from him is.

“Acting for what is right regardless of risk to self and morality is doing what is right no matter what you are told”

We were raised in a middle class family and the enormous hardship he had gone trough to bring up his four children is an untold story to anyone. Though he was a busy man he never neglected his children and always showered us with love and care. He never said no if we need anything but since we do understand his financial status as children we never demanded much either. He carries the burden of his own fears without allowing his children to see it The time we spent with him during our childhood was limited due to his over committed towards his career as a Tamil teacher and social services .However his presence always brings us cheers and happiness which we dearly missed forever.

 He was very unique in giving advices and encouragement for us to excel in life as a whole. He insisted us to workout success on how we can help others within ones capacity and quantify richness in happiness rather than money or wealth.His mentors such as the great philosophers Evera, Anna, Thiruvaluvar and Bharithiyar have had influenced his overall charismatic which in most instances inspired us indirectly. These values were not thought to us but we have learnt from his way of life and unknowingly being embraced by us to the fullest. He is our role model in many ways and we hope we can bring these values passed to our children.

          His challenging part of his life was during his elderly age due to illness where he felt he became a burden and helpless which he could not accept. However, with the support given by his wife, children and close friends, he managed to adapt to the reality and moved on with great will power till his last breath. Even during his last days he still did not give up and fought for his life for the sake of his family. He was in ICU for almost a month which was nearly impossible feat for an elderly man who fought pneumonia with complicated heart attacks, stroke and depended on life support. We are indeed very proud of his will power to live and appreciated every second he prolonged to live, although we knew he was fighting a losing battle. Even during that critical moment he portrayed his qualities of never say dies attitude.

Father with first grandson D.Visvajid Kuhan

We are in believe that he had realised our presence during each and every visit to see him even he was unconscious. We cherished every last moment spent with him but only wished if he was able to talk to us his last words. Every day during his hospitalisation we hoped that he will get up from his deep sleep but we had to accept his slight response was good enough for us. He did response with slight movement and tears which we assume he does realise what is happening around. Those were the ways he expressed his emotions during his last days. 

We felt blessed to have a great father such as him in our life. His beautiful soul is irreplaceable and definitely has been a great loss to us. No matter how many years will be passed yet his memories will always last in our heart forever.May his soul rest in peace and his legacy as a lovable father and social activist will be cherished for a long time to come.

GONE BUT NEVER FORGOTTEN...... WE LOVE YOU ALWAYS “ ACHA”

From his children

Devanand,Yamuna,Yogeetha & Privinna
                              
                                       Video of him in youtube link as below

                 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=elmYcHV_SQ0