In Memory of Dear Father (1941-2013)

11-June-2013, the devastating phone call shattered my heart. I cried out loud but nothing could bring him back alive:( Even writing about it now brings tears to my eyes.The man we loved the most is no more after one month struggling in ICU. I knew you fought your best acha (father), you fought hard to keep breathing for your family sake but god loves you more.Though it was hard we had to accept the fact and let you go peacefully. If only you were alive now and be there for my wedding day, If only i can hug and kiss you again, If only i can see your innocent smile again, If only i can ask for Sorry for hurting you & If only i can say I Love You! Below is a memoir written by me & my siblings for my father's book release, Thanks to his good friends who worked to fulfil his last wish. Yes finally it was released last year ( 2014) a book about his life. Below is the memoir :

This memoir is written in living remembrance of our dearest father who was the most lovable hero that will be missed forever. Every human being is born and brought to this world by a man and a woman who we address them as parents. We as their children have that special person in our lives and felt fortunate about it .We are also very grateful to them who brought us up to the successful person we are now.The best words to describe our father would be unwavering love, honesty, humility and definitely a man of extra ordinary moral courage. The values that he embraced were a legacy for us to emulate indeed.

His nature of forgiving and sincerity gave us the much needed believe in leading a purposeful life for all of us. He is a true life hero who put others above him and never longed for anything in returns at any time. The entire life lessons taught by our father were humility, courage and honesty. The most memorable wisdom advice from him is.

“Acting for what is right regardless of risk to self and morality is doing what is right no matter what you are told”

We were raised in a middle class family and the enormous hardship he had gone trough to bring up his four children is an untold story to anyone. Though he was a busy man he never neglected his children and always showered us with love and care. He never said no if we need anything but since we do understand his financial status as children we never demanded much either. He carries the burden of his own fears without allowing his children to see it The time we spent with him during our childhood was limited due to his over committed towards his career as a Tamil teacher and social services .However his presence always brings us cheers and happiness which we dearly missed forever.

 He was very unique in giving advices and encouragement for us to excel in life as a whole. He insisted us to workout success on how we can help others within ones capacity and quantify richness in happiness rather than money or wealth.His mentors such as the great philosophers Evera, Anna, Thiruvaluvar and Bharithiyar have had influenced his overall charismatic which in most instances inspired us indirectly. These values were not thought to us but we have learnt from his way of life and unknowingly being embraced by us to the fullest. He is our role model in many ways and we hope we can bring these values passed to our children.

          His challenging part of his life was during his elderly age due to illness where he felt he became a burden and helpless which he could not accept. However, with the support given by his wife, children and close friends, he managed to adapt to the reality and moved on with great will power till his last breath. Even during his last days he still did not give up and fought for his life for the sake of his family. He was in ICU for almost a month which was nearly impossible feat for an elderly man who fought pneumonia with complicated heart attacks, stroke and depended on life support. We are indeed very proud of his will power to live and appreciated every second he prolonged to live, although we knew he was fighting a losing battle. Even during that critical moment he portrayed his qualities of never say dies attitude.

Father with first grandson D.Visvajid Kuhan

We are in believe that he had realised our presence during each and every visit to see him even he was unconscious. We cherished every last moment spent with him but only wished if he was able to talk to us his last words. Every day during his hospitalisation we hoped that he will get up from his deep sleep but we had to accept his slight response was good enough for us. He did response with slight movement and tears which we assume he does realise what is happening around. Those were the ways he expressed his emotions during his last days. 

We felt blessed to have a great father such as him in our life. His beautiful soul is irreplaceable and definitely has been a great loss to us. No matter how many years will be passed yet his memories will always last in our heart forever.May his soul rest in peace and his legacy as a lovable father and social activist will be cherished for a long time to come.

GONE BUT NEVER FORGOTTEN...... WE LOVE YOU ALWAYS “ ACHA”

From his children

Devanand,Yamuna,Yogeetha & Privinna
                              
                                       Video of him in youtube link as below

                 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=elmYcHV_SQ0

My Childhood...Flashbacks!!

We all wish to be the happy little kid again don't we? I do really really miss my childhood and life back than compared to the hustle and bustle of city life nowadays.. yea i live in KL now !

Of course nothing is better than our hometown right? I'm budak Teluk Intan which is a small town in the state of Perak. The fresh air,coconut trees, the cycle ride to school, ting-ting man aka roti bai, the humble people and the evening play time with our Taman friend's and etc. I'm sure kids nowadays hardly experience those precious moments. Lifestyle now is all about android's and apple's..its all about virtual click click swap swap nothing much than that. 

I'm very thankful to be born in the 80's ..great childhood years but perhaps our parents childhood were even better...probably true indeed because my mum always shares her stories which were quite interesting such as playing near the river, drinking water from the well, walking in the rubber estate, studying under the lantern light,getting bitten by the angry swan's and also not forgetting the getting whacking story...LOL. My mum is a very good story teller like seriously she sometimes repeats the same story till we memorised it so well hehe while my father is the quiet ones so he writes diary everyday and keep it personal to himself. Yea he does share some interesting stories but my mum is the champion la :) In the future I will share my story to my kids and brag about how superb it was

(filter the whacking probably).Anyways I was a good girl ehemmm so compared to my siblings my rotan story not that much la.

I lived in a mixed neighbourhood with all races living together peacefully.Those were the days we knew our neighbours very well and helped each other when in need. All the kids in the neighbourhood will wait for our 'golden play time' in the evening..as we were only allowed to play from 4 p.m to probably around 6 plus and than all the mummy's will start shout out adik masuk !!! There was once my friends and I played masak masak ( cooking ).We had this old pan, bricks as our stove, some stolen onions from mum's kitchen and lighter. Guess what happened? One of my friend placed the lighter near the burning bricks so daboooom 'MELETOP'/minor explosion! End up all of us ran back to house and realised some hair burnt away with some black stains on our innocent face. So we quickly washed the stains and blew off the burnt hair away haha..than act like nothing happened phew....Thank god it was just minor explosion and thinking back how dumb was it to place a lighter near burning fire.It is all because of the Ah Ching boy ! I wonder where he is now ?

                             THAN :View opposite my house back in hometown :) How peaceful

                                   NOW:View opposite my office....